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If you’re looking for advice on how to have a biblical marriage, you’ve come to the right spot!
Inside: Want the secret to a lasting, happy, and God honoring marriage? This godly marriage advice is exactly what you need to grow in your relationship with your spouse.
Advice for a Godly Marriage
I was a young bride.
Engaged at 19, and married shortly after, I read books and thought I knew all there was to know about marriage!
But unlike a trade or a career, you can’t just be a good student of marriage without actually being married.
So, as excited as I was about becoming the perfect wife, it took time, love, grace, and experience built on a solid godly foundation to have a God honoring marriage.
I’m confident to tell you that my husband and I are both very happy as we walk together through life, honoring God with our marriage.
The following godly marriage advice is exactly what we have done in our marriage to build a solid relationship.
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As you strive to build a solid marriage, keep the following things in mind.
Keep God at the Center of Your Marriage
The absolute best advice I could ever give you is to keep God at the center.
No matter where you are in your Christian walk.
It doesn’t matter.
Find a time each day to spend in the Word both separately, and together. The closer each of you grows to God, the closer you will grow to each other.
Picture a triangle with God at the top and each of you at the opposing corners. As you each make it a priority to pursue God and grow closer to Him, then the gap will naturally close between the two of you, and you will become more united.
When you keep God at the center of your marriage, you’ll find your marriage will be much more enjoyable and glorifying to God.
Love and Respect Each Other
After keeping Christ at the center, you will find that simply loving and respecting each other will go a long way in having a happy and lasting, godly marriage.
Scripture says to submit to one another in love. (Romans 12:10)
When you truly do that, you’ll find that your marriage will be filled with years of happiness. You’ll honor and glorify God by the testimony of your marriage.
What if your spouse isn’t lovable or respectable? Do your best to love and respect him anyway. You can always find a way to show love.
Recommended Reading: How to Act Right When Your Spouse Acts Wrong (Indispensable Guides for Godly Living)
Keep Current On Your Issues
Never let the sun God down on your anger (Ephesians 4:26) and most certainly don’t let your disagreements fester.
As a young bride (almost 20 years ago), I used to imagine never being angry with my precious husband. I couldn’t imagine one thing he could do that might make me upset.
Reality soon set in, and although I have a beautiful marriage, it didn’t take long to find out that yes, he would do things to annoy me and likewise, ahem, I could manage to bother him. (Not sure why! 😉 )
But how do we have such a beautiful marriage? We keep current on our issues. We don’t let the sun go down on our anger, and we don’t let days pass (we even try not to let hours pass) without resolving an issue.
That takes work, and it takes a commitment, but it’s one of the best pieces of godly marriage advice you can follow.
Recommended Reading: From Forgiven to Forgiving: Learning to Forgive One Another God’s Way
Don’t Know Where to Start?
If you’re accustomed to burying your problems, leaving them unresolved to fester and eventually blow up, then you’ll need to start new habits.
Talk to your husband about learning a new way to communicate.
Tell him you want to be more intentional about resolving your issues immediately and working toward a healthier marriage.
Be honest about your feelings and decide on an action plan.
If you aren’t in the habit of resolving your issues right away, it will take some time to do things a new way. And that’s not a bad thing.
Everything gets better with time and practice.
Attack the problem and not the person.
Let your husband know what makes you upset but rather than saying, “You make me angry,” you can say, “When you _____, it makes me angry.”
You should see a different response from your husband when you approach your disagreements this way.
Be Gracious to One Another
One of my favorite Scripture passages is Proverbs 19:11,
Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense. (ESV)
Because love covers a multitude of sins. (I Peter 4:8)
Sure, I could always find fault with something my husband does, and yes, he could find fault with me.
But when we’re gracious with each other and work hard to overlook each other’s offenses, we’re much more likely to have a solid marriage.
Do you struggle to give your husband grace? What would your marriage look like if the next time you were frustrated by something he did, you overlooked it.
I’ve found that often times in my marriage, I’ve thought my husband was intentionally doing something to frustrate me.
I’ve even managed to get upset with him. Only to find out that he didn’t even realize.
My friend, is it possible that you could you be upset with your spouse and he doesn’t even realize why?
Try overlooking offenses and you’ll find that being more gracious will make you both more happy.
Always Honor Your Marriage Vows
Whether you took your marriage vows one year ago or twenty years ago, you must honor your vows.
Remember what you pledged at the alter?
Your commitment to love and honor your husband, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, must be protected!
You might not intentionally think about your wedding vows on a daily basis, but each decision you make to honor your husband is to honor your vows.
Marriage is a process of sanctification for both of you and honoring your vows is a part of that process.
When you give up your own desires and put your husband first, you’re honoring your vows.
Stay committed to each other through thick and thin.
Now, if you’re working hard to follow this godly marriage advice and your keeping Christ at the center of your marriage, honoring your marriage vows should be easy.
My husband and I have taken time every so often to review our marriage vows and remind ourselves and each other of what we said at the alter.
Then we keep our commitment.
Don’t Commit Emotional Adultery
Often overlooked, emotional adultery is becoming more widely accepted.
Sure, it’s not as blatant as physical adultery, but the implications are the same.
But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman (person) with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
For this reason, make every effort to safeguard your marriage.
Put up boundaries with people of the opposite sex.
Be careful who you text and who you allow on your Facebook friends list.
Don’t confide in men (unless it’s your husband.)
Place a hedge of protection around your marriage!
It’s very easy to protect your marriage if you’re careful to do these things.
If you take the proper precautions, you’ll be safeguarding your marriage and the results will be worth it!
Keep Intimacy Alive
Keep the fire burning!
Unfortunately for most couples, intimacy is the first thing to get put on the back burner.
Don’t let this happen to your marriage!
I get it! Life is busy and if you’re like me, you probably have a million and one things on your plate that you feel like will never get accomplished.
But hear me say this loud and clear:
If you’re too busy to have sex with your husband, then you’re too busy!
Physical intimacy in marriage is your safe guard against the risk of having temptation set in. By meeting your husband’s physical needs you actually help keep him pure. (Please don’t hear me say that if your husband has struggled with pornography, that it’s your fault.)
You are the only person in this world that can meet your husband’s physical needs and as a result, you have the responsibility and privilege of being intimate with your husband.
Sometimes that can be a struggle, whether your schedule is too tight or your desire is absent. I have a challenge for you:
Discuss the issue with your husband and then decide on a time when the two of your will commit to setting aside time for each other physically.
When the time comes, don’t schedule other things. Protect the time and then whether you feel like it or not, make it happen!
Scripture warns against being apart for too long. (1 Corinthians 7:5) God knew that you and your husband need each other sexually and that being together is the best way to protect against affairs in the marriage.
Recommended Reading: The Mingling of Souls: God’s Design for Love, Marriage, Sex, and Redemption
Use this Godly Marriage Advice to Grow Your Marriage
Of course, I could never tell you everything there is to know about having a godly marriage, but I do know that these are the very things my husband and I do in our marriage and I couldn’t be happier.
If you’re struggling in your marriage right now, let me reach out and give you a virtual hug. I want you to know that you can start wherever you’re at to grow your marriage, no matter how difficult your situation may seem.
Cry out to God and lay your burdens at His feet. He knows you and He understands.
If you are blessed to have a great marriage already, I’m so glad! Use this godly marriage advice to grow your marriage even more.
See how having Christ at the center of your marriage will make all the difference!
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What godly marriage advice do you have to share? What things would you add? Are you struggling in your marriage right now? I’d love to hear form you and pray for you. Feel free to share!
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Godly Marriage Advice: Seven Tips You Need to Know!